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Monday Morning Hangover


Dear NFL,


Damn good games this weekend. Kickers were either villains or heroes. It sucks though we are going to have to watch the Patriots and Giants again though. Was hoping for Pats and 49’ers. Now we are going to have to hear about how it’s a rematch from the Super Bowl that the Giants ruined the Patriots perfect season. Also we will hear about how it’s not a subplot, but it is and how everyone is not thinking about it but they are. Subplots to the game suck…just play the game. Its not wrestling and we don’t need a lead up story to the main event.


Love, Doug

The guy that is both excited and not excited and reading sub-plots but not really, expecting but not expecting a revenge game.



Dear NFL Rule Makers,


Ok glad we got some reform in the OT rules, but they still suck. Not only that they are confusing. If the first team scores a touchdown game over, but if not ….etc, etc. How about this? I know this is far fetched and highly progressive but…what if you let the teams play the whole OT quarter and at the end the team leading wins. If it’s still tied, then you go to sudden death. Wow I know that is a crazy idea and it might make for better football and I know adding this rule to regular season games might make the NFL even better. Look into it.


Love, Doug,

The guy shaking his head at you dumb asses.



Dear Danny Woodhead,

Chad Johnson changed his last name to OchoCinco. He was a total dumbass for doing that. Maybe you should too. If you have never considered changing your first name to Morning, you really need to get on that. I can hear it now. “Morning Woodhead is on fire today.” “Morning Woodhead just penetrated the goal line.”  You could be a millionaire with merchandising alone.


Love, Doug

The guy that loves a good penis joke



Dear Eli Manning,


Keep grinding buddy. I’m still behind you for the MVP. By making it to the Super Bowl you have proved why you are better than Aaron Rodgers or Drew Brees.


Love, Doug

The guy calling it how it should be



Dear Pro-Bowl,


We don’t care.


Love, Doug

The founder of the No More Pro-Bowls Movement



Dear MU,


Ok, you have my attention. Let’s see if you can convince me to hop on the bandwagon or not. Enjoy it while you can, I have said it before and I will say it again. You will get rolled in the SEC next year. Make it count while you can.


Love, Doug

Apologizing while winking



Dear Murray State,

Welcome you are the new fraud in the Top 25. Play a Top 25 team and then brag about your 20-0 record. It’s easy to look good when you are playing glorified high school teams.


Love, Doug

The guy that despises easy schedules



Dear Kentucky Wildcats,


Welcome back to the top boys…keep rocking. The national championship is yours if you want it.


Love, Doug

Loyal Big Blue Fan



Dear Joe Paterno,


Don’t worry about death; you are an expert at staying silent.


Love, Doug

The guy that does not follow the too soon rule


Doug Cheatham